Cut that out!

When you live in China, you really can start to develop some serious pet peeves.  One of my biggest pet peeves out here is cutting in line (插队).  It’s gotten a lot better over the years but every once in a while, I still get an impatient guy who just has to try sneaking in front of me.  Usually, a nice tap on the shoulder and a polite, "Excuse me, you need to stand in line." (对不起，你要排) will suffice.  However, there are those times when politeness on your end doesn’t work and you just have to take matters in your own hands. 

About half a year ago, I was at the airport standing in line waiting to check in for a flight to Beijing.  All of a sudden, this one guy walks past me and starts chatting with the fellow directly in front of me.  Giving him the benefit of the doubt, I figure, OK, maybe they are traveling together and he was just saving his place in line.  But then I overheard their conversation, a simple "What time is it?" (现在是几点？)  After the fellow directly in front of me answered his question, the guy just stood next to him.  I kind of looked at him and he flashed me this cheesy smile.  The guy wasn’t going to move to the back of the line and we continued moving towards ticketing counter.  This pretty much confirmed that he was definitely a line cutter and I was determined NOT to let him succeed in his cutting in line (插队) attempt.  I kept on staring at him but he kept on flashing me that cheesy smile as if he was saying, “Hey everything’s cool.”  But of course, it was not and  I was starting to boil.

When we finally reached front of the line and it was almost his turn to be next at the ticket counter I politely said to him,  "Excuse me, you need to stand in line. (对不起，你要排) I am next in line.” 

Again with that cheesy smile he then answered to me, “So sorry but I’m late for my flight, I really don’t want to miss my plane.” 

To that I answered, “Can I see you ticket? Let me see when your flight leaves.”

Again he flashed that smile which was now really irritating, “No, no, I’m really late. I  need to go first.”

Alright I thought, I gave it my best shot at asking him politely to go to the back of the line and obviously it didn’t work.  I was starting to get really angry.  Even though I was thinking to myself, relax Dave, don’t get too upset, I really couldn’t hold back.  I couldn’t accept that this guy blatantly just cut in line (插队) in front of me so I dropped my backpack to the ground, pointed at him and just screamed, “GET THE HELL TO THE BACK OF THE LINE, YOU FOOL!” 

All heads turned my way.  Everyone looked at me then looked at him.  Without a word, he lowered his head and basically sprinted to the back of the line dragging his luggage.  People were still looking at me and I answered them all by saying, No problem, no problem (没事, 没事).

Not long afterwards, I checked in and boarded the plane without a hitch. As I settled into my seat, who did I see from a distance board the plane but my cutting in line (插队) buddy.  As he walked past my seat, I greeted him by saying, “Hi there, haste makes waste? (欲速则不达), right? Would you like my autograph?”  Startled, he lowered his head tried squeezing past the guy in front of him to get away from me.  He absolutely was terrified at me. However I thought to myself, “There’s one guy who probably will never cut in line  (插队) again for the rest of his life.”

Although it’s a very exaggerated version of what really happened and no one should really loose their temper, So for all you readers reading this, I still hope that the next time someone cuts in line (插队), don’t just sit there and let it happen as it will just encourage the line cutter to continue his or her line cutting ways.  While I don’t recommend making a scene like what I did, you should at least let the line cutter understand that it’s just wrong.  Hopefully if we all do this, we’ll have a cutting in line (插队) free city for the rest of the world to see. Hey,  the World Expo are coming up..and I’ll be a much happier person. 

Vocabulary

插队- cutting in line
没事 - No problem
对不起，你要排队。- Excuse me, you need to stand in line.
现在是几点？- What time is it？
欲速则不达  - Haste makes waste